Tuesday, March 05, 2013

List Of Bryan Singer's Abandoned Or Almost Abandoned Projects

1. Six Billion Dollar Man
2. Battlestar Galactica

3. The Munsters (TV series)
4. Logan's Run
5. Bunion Thunder
6. Bob Fosse mini series (HBO)
7. Ghostie Boy
8. Smellevision
9. X-Men: Last Stand
10. Jack The Giant Killer
11. Harp Scooter
12. The Prisoner
13. Wolverine 2
14. X-Men 3
14 and a half. X-Men 7
15. Aim High 
16. X-Men: First Class
17. X-Men: Days of Future Past (Abandonment Pending)
18. Freedom Formula: Ghost of The Wasteland
19. The Mayor of Castro Street: The Life & Times of Harvey Milk
20. Capeshooters
21. The Twilight Zone (Abandonment Pending)
22. Confessions of a Dangerous Mind 
23. Gref Dafflebaum (Hats Episode)
24. X-Men Origins: Magneto
25. Superman: The Man of Steel
26. uwantme2killhim?
27. Butt Smell
28. Big Rock
29. Flouride is Safe
30. Your Mama Is So Fat...
31. How Fat Is She?
32. She So Fat, When She Sits Around The House, People Die

Wednesday, November 02, 2011


WHO does BRYAN SINGER think he is? He is a poopy pants.

I have it ON RECORD that BRYAN SINGER is a poopy pants. His PANTS are POOPY. A POOPY PANTS? Yes, he is a POOPY PANTS.


It's no secret that BRYAN SINGER is a POOPY PANTS. Those who say BRYAN SINGER is NOT a POOPY PANTS are wrong, because BRYAN SINGER is a POOPY PANTS. You who deny this are POOPY PANTS deniers, because, as I say, BRYAN SINGER is a POOPY PANTS.

Why is BRYAN SINGER a POOPY PANTS? I'll tell you why - because BRYAN SINGER is a POOPY PANTS. BRYAN SINGER is a POOPY PANTS. BRYAN SINGER is a POOPY PANTS. If you deny that BRYAN SINGER is a POOPY PANTS, then let me assure you that BRYAN SINGER is a POOPY PANTS.

If BRYAN SINGER is a POOPY PANTS, then BRYAN SINGER is a POOPY PANTS. I have it on record that BRYAN SINGER is a POOPY PANTS. I was told by my neighbor that BRYAN SINGER is a POOPY PANTS. The voices inside my head never cease to whisper that BRYAN SINGER is a POOPY PANTS. If I could write one song, the name of that song would be BRYAN SINGER is a POOPY PANTS. Please don't forget that BRYAN SINGER is a POOPY PANTS. If you take away one fact from this blog, you should take away the fact that fluoride is safe for tooth decay prevention, but if you take away two facts, take away the fluoride thing and the fact that BRYAN SINGER is a POOPY PANTS.


Thursday, January 27, 2011

My New Gran Torino

I just bought a mint condition 1968 Gran Torino and a house in LA based on the sales of self-published, 98-page pamphlets that nobody buys and are completely unavailable in retail outlets.

How did I do it? Simple. Acid. I'm stoned out of my gourd, and as Mother brings me my PB&J, I tell her all about my fictional dates with non-Jewish actresses and how I plan to become a Mormon so I can destroy the LDS Church from the inside.

Plus I play Farmville.

Gotta go! Crops must be harvested, and I have to go to the ribbon-cutting of the Library of Languatron, which I hallucinate exists next to the Tower of London but is actually an extension of the sores built by the crabs who live in my anal psoriasis.

Monday, June 21, 2010

I Am Languatron And I Eat Pound Cake All Day

All day long. MMMMMMMMMM! Do I love POUND CAKE!!! I weigh 873 POUNDS now. WHy? Well I gain 1 POUND FOR every 1 CAKE. And I ate 600 CAKES last WEEK ALONE! (SOMETIMES I barf them up.)


Monday, June 07, 2010

Sorry it's been so long!

Actually, no I'm not. I hate you and your silly ass face. I have been busy hating a TV show, and that's taken up most of my time. Between that and my anal psoriasis, I've been quite a busy man.

Sometimes I diddle, but that usually takes time away from everything I hate. And I have NO TIME TO WASTE! I've spent over a DECADE screaming about the same thing over and over and over, and I'm not about to STOP NOW!!! NOSIRREE BOB!!!!!!!!! There's still SO MUCH that I can HATE!!!!

Why are you reading this? Are you a UNIVERSAL STUDIOS SPY?!!! No, you're not. `You're GLEN A. LARSON, aren't you, EDWARD JAMES OLMOS?

By the way, I've promised that there are 1,001 reasons to hate Edward James Olmos. The problem is that I can only think of 10, and they're all pretty much the same reason, which is that I hate him.

Jews, Mormons, gays, and brunettes all SUCK!!

Thank you for a delightful evening.

Friday, February 29, 2008

I'm a bit of a jackass.

I apologize that it has taken me so long to update this site. But now that I've been kicked off my old site, I have nowhere else to go. I was kicked off of Tripod.com for violating the Terms of Service agreement and posting personal contact information on the Internet. I now see how wrong that was. I won't tell anyone about this site, though, because of my deep shame and my colossal personal embarrassment. Frankly, I'm just not that bright. I'm also flamboyantly gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that, because there isn't.

Anyway, sorry for wasting your time. As you read this, I'm busy fondling the lint in my navel.

And I just farted. Whew! Busy day for me. My mother, who I live with, will be very proud of me. I might eat all my vegetables tonight.

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Universal's "Ultimate Galactica DVD?" Crap On A Stick!

I heard it through the grapevine that June 2012 is the intended release date for the "Ultimate Galactica DVD Set." Come on Vivendi-Universal!! Do I have to squeeze it out of you? When is that cancellation announcement for the DVD set going to slime its way out of your corporate offices? 6 months from now? 10 months from now? 24 hours before the COMPLETED ULTIMATE DVD sets are scheduled to ship to stores? I'm putting my guess on 24 hours before. Vivendi-Universal always did have a flare for the melodramatic in cancelling Galactica projects literally hours before their intended release.

June 2012, Vivendi-Universal? Thats a "long ass" time away isn't it? In 11 years, not only could you manufacture an entire Galactica DVD set, but you could also hire Richard A. Colla and Alan J. Levi to reconstruct the entire Galactica pilot for you from scratch-(ala' Robert Wise & Star Trek-The Motion Picture) with the missing Galactica footage!!

1) The post-Carrilon Victory Celebration.
2) Serinas cancer.
3) All of the missing footage with John Fink as the Galactica doctor.

4) Tigh showing Starbuck & Boomer the replayed video of the colony attacks on the bridge.

5) Tigh trying to convince Adama not to resign from the council.

6) More footage with Sire Uri.

7) Athena & Apollo speaking with Adama in his quarters.

11 months on the other hand Vivendi-Universal, also gives you plenty of time to cook up another excuse to not release the "Galactica DVD Set", right? For all we know Vivendi-Universal, you could be sitting on your rump right now, never intending to spend the next 11 months making a "Galactica DVD Set."

Prove me wrong Vivendi-Universal, and release this "Galactica DVD Set" in June 2012. Or, go ahead and prove me RIGHT!!!-and never release a "Galactica DVD Set" at all!!!

I know you're going to prove me right, Vivendi-Universal. Because you always do!!! Predicting your behavior is easier than being a psychic!!!

As a footnote, I did predict Tom Desantos departure from the Galactica production a good 4 months before it happened, didn't I? And I predicted it would be Vivendi-Universals doing and fault, didn't I?